A&M are having a sleepover this weekend as a thank you for all the hard work they did. N has a soccer tournament Saturday morning so I offered to take the girls to see Soul Surfer, a movie they wanted to see. When R offered it up to them they said, “No, we want to go to soccer because Tom will be there!” Tom is the ex’s new love. It’s not that they want to go see soccer or that he’ll be there and they want to see him that hurts so much, but that I KNOW that they will never say that about me. they will never say to Tom (or anyone else) “No we don’t want to go do something with you, because Jen will be someplace else we could go.”
It killed me. I’m glad he’s a good guy and that the kids like him. I’m just worried that they will start to like him more than their Dad, and that Dad will then get swept aside. That will kill him. Regardless their comment made me think, “Why am I investing so much of myself into these people who barely even acknowledge my existence?” I’m tired of the bitchy comments. And they are 11! It’s only going to get worse. Sorry R, I can’t just turn it off and not let it affect me. I don’t even want to see them.
I am wishing away then next 7 years because by then the girls will be 18 and will not be our problem and N will be dead.
I know…I’m evil. But right now, I just don't care.
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