Water water everywhere...

A week ago we came home after a nice dinner and drinks, ready for the next step of the evening only to find water. Water coming out of a faucet and running everywhere because the faucet had been tilted to the right and the water was not running into the very large utility sink beneath it, but rather over the edge onto the utility room floor. And through the walls. Into the garage. Into the basement. Water everywhere. It had been on for hours. He had left the house around 1:30 or 2 that afternoon, and then had met me for drinks and food. We got home around 7 or 7:30. Early for us. Thank goodness!

I ran to Menards, he started cleaning up and told me "It's not as bad as it looks." I had only seen the laundry room at that point. I believed him. When I got home with a new wet/dry vac and a $35 fan (the only large fan I could find in the cold of winter) I went downstairs to help.

And I saw water.
Everywhere.
It was worse than it looked.
Much, much worse.

Water/wetness was on the concrete wall, the studs, the sheet rock. Everything was soaked. Enough water on the floor that the sump pump went off. A couple of times. Water in a vent that we had to put a hole in to get out.

On the finished side of the basement the wall was wet. There was a water bubble under the paint. The carpet was wet. The electronics were hit (I have not been brave enough to try them yet to see if they are damaged.) The ceiling was wet.

Instead of spending the evening relaxing in a warm glow, we were standing in cold water cleaning up all the water. Wasting that lovely buzz we had gotten snuggling at the restaurant on sucking up water from the carpet, walls, etc.

Now to the best part. I never lost my cool. I held it in. Now his ex would have chewed him a new one. She would have screamed and yelled, and told him that he was the one who caused this so he could fix it. Then she'd get on the phone and call her mother and complain LOUDLY about what a screw up he was. The needling would continue for weeks as she told everyone what an idiot her husband was until she felt she got enough mileage out of it, or until he did something else wrong in her eyes.

I could see him when I said "I figured out what that stream of water out the garage was. The water was on in here." The look in his eyes. Like a dog or small child getting ready to be hit. Knowing that not only are they going to be blamed for this, but that the blame would harsh and continuing and never forgotten. I know what his marriage was like before me. I also know what his childhood was like. So, I held it in. There was no reason to yell. He beats himself up worse than I ever could.

Instead I released it in the car on the way to and from Menards about WHO in their RIGHT MIND would leave the water not just on, but on and the faucet aimed outside of the sink? Who DOES this?

My darling husband that's who. He is wonderful but absent minded. He gets focused on doing one thing to the exclusion of everything else. He puts his headphones on and blocks out the world (including me, the kiddos, eating, etc.) to get what he is working on, done. Which also means that sometimes he has accidents like this. That is who he is. He will work from sun up to midnight on something stopping only at the brink of exhaustion to have a drink, a quick snack (because he is shaking from lack of food), bathroom, and sleep only if necessary. That is the man I married and promised that I would love "for better or worse."

This quality is what makes him so good at his job. It is what makes him finish projects he starts around the house. It is what makes him a "doer" instead of a "sitter." I had a sitter before. I didn't like it. I couldn't get him to do anything. Take out the trash, do his share of housework, yard work, snow removal, cook, laundry, nothing. All he did was sit and play video games.

R is different. While he is absent minded at times he does gets shit done. He makes me feel bad because I can't keep up (I get distracted by shiny things.) He will help clean the house and will not stop until it is done. (Unlike me who will do a little here, a little there, and eventually finish a few hours later because of all of said shiny things I run into. :) ) He can clean a 4500 square foot house, do the laundry, and do all the yard work in under one day because he is so focused. It is a quality I LOVE about him, but at times that quality is clearly detrimental.

I sometimes wish that while he was focused he could also see what else is going on around him. But that is not who he is. If I try and change him I will end up frustrated and so will he. He is a good man and a hard worker even if he can't always see the forest for the trees. He is wonderful. He tries so hard. He works so hard to make me happy, and he does. I am very happy with him. I'm lucky.

But so is he. :)