Irresponsible, uncaring, selfish, Bword...I guess that's how you see me

Those were all terms that the ex called me last night.  She dropped the girls off last night at our house. This NEVER HAPPENS. We always pick up and drop off. ALWAYS.  There is a reason for this. The boy is handicapped and needs a handicap van. So the van goes with the kids. But it is a real pain for everyone on our end and she just gets to sit there and enjoy the ride.

But I digress.

Hubby and the boy were at the movies, having taken the day off of school after a medical appointment. The ex was dropping the girls off. I was taking the girls to the movies for the second of a double feature for the boys. So far no issue. But I got held up at work and I lost track of time.

I was late.

She was early.

Chaos ensued. Well, for a normal, rational person it wouldn't have. But for the ex it did. The girls are 12 and know the garage code to get into the house. They stay home alone all the time. No problem. She didn't leave though. She waited.
and waited
and waited

and got angrier and angrier and angrier as she waited.

When I got home I was ambushed and called every name under the sun. I stood there and listened and let her rant. I let her yell and scream and call me names. Thank God it is cold and the neighbors had their windows closed and were inside. Then again it would have been a good show for them. When she was finally finished she asked if I had anything to say for myself. In a very calm and caring voice I said, "I'm sorry." Then I turned around and walked into the house.

She continued to yell and call me names.
I continued to walk.

The girls were sitting on the couch texting their friends. They missed the whole thing. Part of me is happy about this. No kid should see their parent completely flying off the handle. BUT another part of me wishes they had seen and heard everything. Wishes they had seen the crazy we deal with every day that they don't believe exists.

But that...THAT...is the irresponsible, uncaring, selfish thing. So I remain happy that I was the adult (to her 10 years my senior) and I was the calm one and that I responded the way I did and walked away. The high road sucks. I hate the high road.  It is the hard path, the place without instant gratification, where you don't get to say exactly what you think while you're thinking it.

But it is not the weak place. Had the girls seen it all, they would have seen me responding in kind to their mother, who will never do wrong in their eyes. Who will always be Number One. And I would have been the bad guy regardless of what a rational person might have done in a similar situation.

Instead I acted as though they were watching. I took the high road. I apologized and left without calling names or saying hurtful things. And if they did see me, I am proud of the way I acted and I hope they choose to mirror my actions and not hers. Hope.